Rage Filled Revelations
by Ryo Toya
Summary: Ken loves Ryu, but is afraid to tell him. What will happen when his feelings become almost too much to bear? What will happen when Ryu finds out? Yaoi. RyuKen. Rated M for violence and romance in future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Hello! I wrote this first chapter of a Ryu/Ken fic a loooooooong time ago, and I've decided to pick it up again. It has more angst than I usually write now, but I hope you like this first part!

**Title: **Rage-filled Revelations

**Genre and Pairing:** Yaoi and Ryu/Ken (You don't like this stuff, don't read it. Simple as that.)

**Notes:** Angst, extreme violence against inanimate objects. Possible smut in future chapters.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the Street Fighter universe. That belongs to Capcom. Furthermore, I am not making a dime off of this.

**Key:**

_Italics_ means a person's thoughts.

----- means a change in POV.

* * *

Chapter 1: Confusion, Rage, and Confession

_Goddamn it, where is he?_ Ken thought, as he searched the forest around him for Ryu, his best friend, sparring partner, and right now, most annoying thing in the world.

_We are supposed to be fighting, not playing hide-and-seek!_ Ken grumbled as he ran through the woods.

Why does he always insist on stealth fighting? Whatever happened to good-old-fashioned- 

All of a sudden, his train of thought was brought to a sudden halt as a leg came out of nowhere and tripped him up. Ken went sprawling into the dirt, and was about to get up when he felt a strong, muscular set of arms pin his arms, and a heavy weight pin him to the ground.

"Caught you." Ryu taunted, smirking as he held his friend to the forest floor. He changed position so he could pin Ken better. "How come you are so easy to catch lately? Getting lazy?" Ryu whispered into his ear.

Ken gasped at first, angry that he had been caught off guard again. However, he soon was caught even more off guard as he felt Ryu settle more solidly on his back. He was surprised to feel a strange tingle everywhere Ryu touched his skin. _Great. I lost again. I can't seem to get my mind and body to be on the same page anymore. I try to play it calm and cool around him, like I used to, but not anymore. I babble, blush, and…_

Ken gasped again as he felt Ryu's breath on his ear, and shuddered as certain parts of him woke up. "Get off me! Now!" Ken struggled as hard as he could to get away, and managed to push Ryu off him. He stood up and looked away, trying to calm himself down.

"Whoa! What's up with you all of a sudden?" Ryu retorted. "Why are you acting so strange around me anymore? You can never seem to beat me. You aren't a challenge like you used to be." Looking down at his gi, he pulled off the now torn and muddy top and slung it over his shoulder. He'd patch it up later.

Ken looked over his shoulder at the sound of the gi hitting the leaf-strewn dirt and looked at Ryu, bare to the waist standing there, stretching his arms over his head. Ken felt a heat go into his cheeks, and found that he could not look away. Fine then, if he couldn't look away, he would go somewhere he couldn't see it anymore. He couldn't let Ryu see him act like this. "Gotta go, see ya back at the dojo." With that brief farewell, Ken headed back to the temple they were staying in as fast as he could.

-----

_What was _that _all about? _Ryu wondered. Shrugging it off, he grinned and drew a point in the air with his finger. _Another fight goes to me._ As pleased as he was with his string of victories over his friend and rival, Ryu was also genuinely concerned about Ken. Ken could never look him in the eye or keep up with his attacks anymore. He also looked so lost and confused whenever the two of them were together. _Ah, well, he will probably get over it on his own._ Ryu shrugged and began his walk back to the temple.

-----

_What the hell is wrong with me! What's going on!_ Ken was frustrated with his lack of success, not only in the spars with Ryu, but also with his inner thoughts. He had no idea how to address the way he felt about Ryu. As he walked down the main hall of the temple, his mind wandered. _I can't just tell him. I'm sure he would be disgusted to know me if I told him that I...I love him. What if he rejects me! I can't do that. He could leave me forever…. _When that thought hit him, Ken saw red. The last coherent thought he had was of Ryu's eyes filled with disgust and his back as he turned and walked away forever. That image snapped something inside him. He had to take his anger, sadness, and frustration out on something, anything. "GOD DAMN IT!!" he yelled, and proceeded to kick the hell out of the walls. Letting out a scream of rage and distress, he charged up his strongest Hadouken and let loose on the nearest wall.

-----

_What was that? Sounded like a bomb went off… _Ryu raised his head and looked for smoke. Seeing none, he shrugged and continued on his way. Then he heard it again, louder this time. _It's coming from the temple! Ken! _Ryu began to run as fast as he could. When he got to the temple, he saw none of the monks outside. _Probably cowering inside the shrine. _Ryu grunted and went to find the source of the noise.

When he cautiously turned the corner, a piece of statuary flew at his face. Bending over backwards, he just barely missed being clocked by it. Hiding behind the corner, he pressed himself against the wall for cover and peeked around the building to see who was dismantling the place. He was shocked at what he saw.

Several pieces of sculpted animals and heroes barely stood. The ground was so cratered and dug up that it looked like bombs had been raining from the sky. The terra-cotta tiles on the temple roof shook whenever a new attack was launched. Bamboo brakes were in tatters, bent and splintered. The temple fountain, once so grand and delicate, was little more than a wet rubble pile in the wake of the attacks. But all this wasn't what caught Ryu's attention. What did catch his eye was a crimson flash that suddenly tore through another wall of the temple.

"DAMN IT! DAMN IT DAMN IT!!" was the only thing Ryu heard. Ken was too busy blowing holes in the wall in to notice him. Ken was dirty, his gi was ripped, and his hair even more wild than it normally was. His eyes smoldered with anger. Ryu was stunned to see his friend so enraged. But as he watched, the rage in his eyes sputtered and died, leaving only sadness in its place. Ken stopped killing the wall and began to tremble slightly.

"Damn it. Why do I feel this way?!" His rage spent, Ken turned and slumped against the wall, unaware that Ryu was a mere five feet away, pinned against the wall. "Why can't I just move on? Why?" Ken was quickly becoming hysterical, all his frustration bubbling up after his fury had burned out. Bowing his head, he began to sob. "This is so unfair. Why must it be like this!?"

_Ken's crying. I've never seen him so… desperate. So helpless. What happened?_ Ryu was worried, no, Ryu was scared for Ken. He had been keeping his eye on his best friend for a while, and noticed a change in him. Ken had been slipping up in their spars, he reactions were slower. Not only that, but outside of spars there was still a change. Ken always seemed in a bad mood. He was growing concerned for Ken's well-being. He was about to break his cover and talk to him when the next words stopped him in his tracks.

"WHY CAN'T TELL HIM THAT I LOVE HIM! WHY WHY WHY!!!!!!!" Ken cried. "I can't take much more of this… I just can't…" Still weeping, Ken picked himself up and went back to their room.

Ryu couldn't move. He just couldn't. Ken's words crashed through his mind, rendering him senseless. _He… loves me? Me? That's why he was so mad? So angry lately? He loves me…_ Quite taken aback by this revelation, Ryu found his knees didn't work anymore. He sat down abruptly, back against the wall, Ryu began to think about what he himself felt towards Ken. _What does Ken mean to me? Well, he is important to me, that's for sure… He is my best friend and rival… I remember when I saw him attack me when Bison brainwashed him. I felt like my heart had been crushed in his fist. I won him back though, and together we stopped Bison's plot. I couldn't have done it without him. After that, we became closer than ever. But… what do I really feel for him? Is it just friendship? Could it be more? Could this closeness actually be love? _Quickly shaking his head, he stood. _I don't know right now… I need to think more. _He turned and went back to their room, hoping it was still standing. He breathed a sigh of relief, seeing the temple's housing hadn't been a target of Ken's attacks. Entering, the room was a mess, with broken pottery, cracked tatami floors, and torn wall scrolls, the last victims of Ken's rage. It looked like a tornado hit it. _Yeah, Tornado Ken…_ Moving to his side of the room, Ryu sat down again. Raising a hand to his face, Ryu slouched deeper and began to sort out his feelings. He would be getting very little sleep tonight.

End of Chapter 1

So? What did you think? Please R&R, and I hope you liked it! Chapter 2 coming soon!


	2. Chapter 2

Here's chapter 2. Enjoy!

Oh yeah, just as a reminder:

_Italics _means someones personal thoughts.

-- means a change in POV

* * *

Chapter 2- Depression

As dawn broke, Ken finally began to stir. Groaning, he sat up, cradling his head as if it were made of glass. _What happened?_ He was sore all over, and not just physically. _Oh yeah…_ He doubled over as all the events, emotions, and actions of the day before came flooding back to him. He nearly let out a sob, but it was then that he sensed another presence in the room.

Turning to look behind him, Ken saw Ryu slumped against the wall, asleep. His legs were stretched out in front of him, and his shoulders were tense, evidence that he'd been up most of the night.

_Great. As I slept, he stayed awake. Probably to protect me from the monks. Gods, I can't believe I did that…_ Guilt wrapped its cold fingers around his heart as Ken reached out to grab Ryu's leg and shake him awake. Still a little groggy and uncoordinated, he accidentally brushed the sole of Ryu's foot. Ryu fidgeted in his sleep and let out a chuckle, curling into a ball on the tatami floor.

Ken couldn't help but smile softly at the sight before him. Ryu was peacefully asleep, all curled up on the floor like he usually slept. Hard to believe that this strong, confident and deadly martial artist could sleep so adorably. Reaching down, he brushed a few of Ryu's bangs back into place. As he reached back, his fingers caressed Ryu's cheek on their own accord.

--

Starting at that touch, Ryu slowly began to awaken. Opening bleary eyes, the first thing he saw was Ken's open face, showing his content, loving smile for a second, but when Ken noticed he was looking at him, a cloud of guilt and sadness eclipsed it and he quickly pulled his hand back from Ryu. He was distressed to see Ken act like this, and even more so now that he knew why he was this way. As he sat up, Ken looked away, not meeting his gaze.

"Good morning." Ken's terse reply was bitingly brief, and Ryu inwardly winced at the tone. Just as he was about to return the greeting, a soft knock on the door caused him to stop. Getting up and sliding it open, Ryu found the entire group of monks outside his door.

"Good morning sir. I hope you had a good sleep, but I am sorry to say that, even though this temple is dedicated to training, the damage your companion caused yesterday has caused us to ask you to leave while we make repairs. Please, don't misunderstand. We welcome you to return after the repairs are done, but only once both he and you have your emotions under control. And please tell him to not worry. We've had worse happen to our temple."

Ryu nodded slightly. "I understand. Will you allow us one hour to prepare to depart?"

"Of course, sir, good day." Bowing, the monks turned and left. Closing the door, Ryu turned to look at Ken.

"Ken. We gotta go. The monks need to rebuild." Ryu winced again when he saw Ken flinch at that statement.

"Yeah… sure." Not saying anything more, Ken got up and proceeded to pack his things, his back turned. As he shoved things into his bag, he continued to think about the things that had led up to this. _How can I tell Ryu why I lost control like that? How can I even start to tell Ryu why I had left the temple in such a state?_ Shaking his head, he continued packing. _No. I can never tell him. If I do, and my nightmare comes true, I could completely snap… perhaps for good this time._

"Ready?" Ken nodded slightly and stood, shouldering his pack.

"Good. Then we're leaving." Ryu looked at Ken, a slightly sad expression on his face. He hadn't reached any conclusions last night, but the answer is in him somewhere, and he was determined to find out what it is.

Slipping on their sandals, they opened the door and were confronted by a lone monk. Looking at them seriously, he spoke.

"Do you know where you are going to go?" At their twin head-shakes, he said, "There is a cabin not too far from here. It has not been used in years, but it is still in good condition. You could stay there until the temple is fixed."

Ryu nodded. "Ken, what do you think?" He frowned at Ken's non-committal shrug. Turning back to the monk, he said, "We'll go. Can you please show us the direction we should go?"

"Of course sir. I would be happy to show you the way if you like." At Ryu's nod of thanks, the monk led them out of the temple and into the woods. The trip was silent, save for the sound of their feet on the leaves and twigs strewn on the forest floor.

As they walked, Ryu split his attention between their path and location, but also on Ken. He seemed far more subdued, quiet, and almost spiritless after what had happened. His face continued to show shame and sadness every time he looked in Ryu's direction. However, his face also showed a stubborn will that Ryu knew all too well. He knew that with that there, he could not get Ken to talk openly about what had happened.

Nodding to himself, Ryu resolved to break Ken out of this mood if it was the last thing he did. Turning his attention back to the path, he saw the monk stop at the top of the upcoming hill.

"Here we are." The monk pointed down the small slope to a lone cabin. The tile roof was tall and slanted to keep rainwater from pooling, and the walls, though a bit mossy, looked strong and sturdy.

"There is a well in the back, and we will bring you supplies every other day until the repairs are done." Ryu nodded.

"How long will those be?"

"About two months." Ryu blinked, surprised.

"That's pretty fast."

"We're used to fixing things, being a martial arts temple. However, we don't usually need to fix the temple on such a scale. Your friend is strong indeed."

Nodding, Ryu bowed to the monk, throwing a sidelong glance at Ken. Softly clearing his throat, he got Ken's attention enough for a half-hearted bow. The monk silently turned and disappeared into the woods.

Ryu watched him fade into the forest, then turned to Ken. Waving a hand in front of his face, he saw Ken's eyes stare at him disinterestedly.

"Let's get settled, then we'll continue training in about an hour." Ken nodded slightly in response and plodded to the cabin door. Opening it silently, he entered the cabin, the door closing behind him.

Ryu shook his head. Ken wasn't himself. Where was that spring in his step? The joy in his smile and sparkle in his eye? Maybe it was best to leave him alone and not push him for a while. Ryu shook his head again. _No. That could only hurt him more. He needs me now, and if I go cold on him, it might break him at this stage. No, I'll focus on bringing him back to himself._ Nodding to himself, he waited a moment longer before entering the cabin as well.

Slipping off his sandals, he padded over to the futon that Ken had evidently laid out on the floor, then promptly occupied. He was already asleep again, curled up into a ball. His face bore evidence of tears, and his hands were hugged around himself protectively. He stirred and moaned, constantly shifting around, his sleep restless.

Ryu watched this for only a second before lying down and spooning himself to Ken's back, his arm draped over Ken's waist. At that touch, Ken seemed to calm down, and his breathing grew deeper and more steady as he fell into a more relaxed sleep. His face relaxed and he unconsciously let out a small sigh as he cuddled up neared to the warm, comforting presence behind him.

_I guess training can wait._ Ryu thought. _I got a feeling that he really needs this right now._ He made himself more comfortable and soon drifted off as well, his arm over Ken's waist and his chin on Ken's shoulder.

End Chapter 2

Chapter 3 is coming soon! Please R&R, and I hope you enjoy the chapters to come!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 is finally up!

As always, here's a reminder:

_Italics _means someone's inner thoughts

-- means a change in POV.

* * *

Chapter 3- Nightmares

_"Colonel Guile. Why are you here?" Honda asked._

_"I must speak with Ryu. Ryu, Ken's gone missing. We're sure it's the work of the crime organization Shadowloo."_

_"Captured? What do you mean captured? Ken's too strong to be captured, Colonel Guile."_

_"Even so, it's as I said, Ryu. Ken's been captured by Shadowloo. They're probably looking for you too… Damn. Looks like they're already here."_

_A chopper crested the edge of the mesa in front of the three men, blowing dust all over them and their surroundings. It landed not far from them and the door opened, revealing a cloaked figure. Fierce eyes pierced through the darkness of the hood, and as the person stepped down from the helicopter, Ryu caught flashes of red clothing and blond hair. A gust of wind blew the hood up and off, revealing who it was._

_"Ken!" Ryu was about to run towards his friend, but a strong hand on his arm stopped him. Glancing back, he saw Guile look at him gravely. _

_"That's not Ken. At least not in mind. He's most likely been brainwashed by Bison himself." _

"_You would be correct."_

_An imposing figure appeared from the gloom of the chopper's cabin. White, iris-less eyes looked over the area from a strong, intimidating face. The crimson military uniform and silver shoulder, wrist and shin guards caught not a speck of dust as he began to descend the steps. His large, tough boots clomped as he stepped down, his cape billowing behind him. He grinned menacingly at the men before him from under his cap, the skull adorning it seeming to join him in taunting them. His grin growing, he walked over to stand behind Ken, placing a hand on his shoulder. _

_Ryu growled at Bison. _

_"Get. Your. Hands. Off. Him!" He shouted as he struggled with Guile. Bison chuckled._

_"No. I rather like Ken as my obedient killing machine, don't you?" Bison tauntingly pinched Ken's cheek, getting no reaction from him. Ryu's reaction, however, made up for both of them. _

_"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF HIM!" Ryu bellowed, breaking free of Guile's grasp and charging Bison. He didn't get far though, for a red flash intercepted him, throwing him back with a kick to the stomach. Stumbling back, Ryu clutched his middle as he slumped down from the strong surprise attack. But it wasn't the kick that sent him to his knees. It was the realization of who threw the kick. _

_Ken drew back his leg and settled into a fighting stance, his eyes glaring at Ryu. Bison leaned over and spoke into his ear. _

_"Go. Attack, and if he gives no fight, kill him." At that, Ken roared and charged._

"KEN! NO!" Ryu sat up straight, jolted awake. Breathing heavily, he quickly took in his surroundings. When he returned fully to the present, he slumped forward weakly, his head in his hands.

_Well, I guess that's my answer. When Ken attacked, I had felt hurt and betrayed, that goes without saying. But what I didn't expect was the feeling of loss and loneliness that also welled up. The physical pain was easy enough to bear, but it was the knowledge that it was Ken that was going to destroy me that took my feet out from under me. When he snapped out of it, I was overcome with joy. He came back to me. So that's my answer. I love him, simple as that. _Turning his attention to Ken, Ryu's brow furrowed.

Ken was tossing and turning in obvious distress. Ryu quickly slid back next to Ken and held him protectively. Ken's distressed look vanished as he scooted closer to the presence behind him. Blushing slightly, especially now that he knew how he felt, Ryu considered his options.

_I know I love him and he loves me, but I want him to tell me himself. I want him to be his normal, confident, strong self and tell me. So, I'll wait for him to get the courage to tell me before I tell him. Of course, I'll help him along. I just hope he gets the hint._

Nodding at that, Ryu closed his eyes and settled in for sleep.

--

Ken slowly began to stir a couple hours later. His sleep had been plagued by horrible nightmares, but those had passed suddenly. When he shifted, he could tell why. Ryu was sleeping soundly next to him, his body curled around Ken's.

He felt simultaneously relieved and ashamed at Ryu's actions towards him. He was relieved that Ryu was being so comforting and protective of him instead of shunning him, but he was ashamed that Ryu had to do that in the first place. All the time they had known each other, they never showed weakness on this scale before. Shaking his head, Ken sighed. _No point in worrying about it now… What's done is done. All we can do now is try and move on and forget any of this ever happened._ Ken nodded and twisted slightly to look at Ryu. He just lay there, looking at Ryu's face lovingly.The peace didn't last long though. His happy thoughts soon turned stormy and gray as his depressed and still confused mind made a snap decision. _He looks so peaceful. I can't muck up his life for my own desires. I can't ever tell him how I feel. I'll protect him from everything I can, even myself. _Nodding again, Ken shoved all his worries into the back of his mind and poked Ryu in the stomach.

"Ryu, wake up. We can fit in one good spar before nightfall." Ryu simply moaned softly at the disturbance to his sleep and buried his face in Ken's chest.

"Five more minutes." He mumbled, hugging Ken slightly.

Blushed deeply, Ken pushed him away softly. "No, now!" He was internally grateful he'd kept the stammer out of his voice.

Ryu let out a soft groan and pushed away slightly, stretching his whole body with a loud sigh. He blinked a couple of times and looked at Ken sleepily with a soft smile on his face, not quite awake yet.

Blushing even deeper, Ken turned around quickly and said, "Let's have a small snack, then we can train." Getting up, he hurried over to their packs and took out some provisions. As he rummaged through them, he mentally ranted.

_Gods he's already making it hard not to say anything to him. Does he have any idea how cute he is just after he wakes up?_ Ryu's smile popped into his head with that thought. Shaking his head to rid himself of that mental image, he turned and handed Ryu some of their supplies to eat.

--

Ryu nodded his thanks and took the food. As he began to eat, he glanced sidelong at Ken. Something was up. Ken's behavior had suddenly changed. _It's as though nothing happened. I don't think it's that he's moved on. He's probably just putting on a face to try to comfort and reassure me. Whatever the case, I don't like it._ Giving himself a soft shake to come back to the present, Ryu began eating more aggressively. Finishing before Ken, Ryu stretched and looked over at him.

"When you are done, we'll start getting ready to spar." Ken nodded and smiled at him, causing Ryu to frown slightly. _Something is definitely wrong. No one bounces back that fast_. Ryu silently turned and headed outside, closing the door behind him with a soft clack.

--

When the door closed, Ken visibly slumped. Fisting his hands, he nearly doubled over from his pent-up emotions. _It's so hard to deceive him like this. Maybe I should- NO! KEN! You can't! Think about the possible outcome!_ Ken had a moment of mental vertigo as he again saw Ryu's disgusted face as he turned and walked away, vanishing in the distance. He slumped further, his shoulders sagging in defeat._ No. It's all right. This is for the best, for both of us. For the best. For both of us._ Nodding weakly to himself, he swiped his face to clear away the unshed tears and attacked what was left of his meal. Cleaning up, he glanced over at a broken mirror and schooled his face into what he hoped was that of a carefree and happy individual. Turning, he opened the door and disappeared into the descending darkness.

--

Ryu's frown grew when he saw Ken exit the cabin. He didn't like what he saw. Ken was wearing a mask. Not in the literal sense, but he had a false smile and was trying to act normally. Unfortunately for him, he was having little success. _What is he trying to pull?_ As Ken began to stretch, Ryu found he couldn't keep quiet about his behavior.

"Ken, what are you doing?" Ken blinked for a second, then smiled that false smile again.

"What do you mean? I'm warming up." Ken tried shrugging it off. His mask slipped slightly when Ryu shook his head.

"No Ken. You know what I mean. You blew your top and get depressed, and suddenly you bounce back? No one can do that. What's going on?" Ken's mask slipped a little more.

"Nothing, let's spar." He said hastily.

"No. Answer this question. Why did you go into that fit of rage? I've never seen you like that. Tell me, Ken."

_--_

_Shit! What do I say!_ Ken panicked. He frantically searched for a response, and said the first thing that came to mind. "I was thinking about Bison and how he used me." Ken thought he had given a good answer, but began to panic more when he saw Ryu's expression darken.

"Bullshit. I know you know he's gone, and you had already let out your anger over his using you a long time ago." He looked at Ken, his face clear of any hurt at Ken's lying to him. His eyes alone showed his pain. Opening his mouth, he continued. "But, I'll accept that for now, until you find me trustworthy enough to hear the truth."

_Damn. Wrong answer. Now what?_ Ken got his answer when Ryu got into his ready stance. He'd seen that stance hundreds, no, thousands of times before, but he'd never seen Ryu look at him with those eyes before. It seemed as if Ryu didn't even know how to react to Ken's lies. The pure hurt and confusion in those eyes hit him hard and his knees gave out. The mask shattered as it fell from his face and he began to weep, his face bowed slightly.

There was a moment of silence, then Ken heard Ryu approach him. Ken shrunk back unconsciously as he saw Ryu's feet come into view, and his eyes widened as he felt Ryu caress his cheek softly before kneeling down and gathering Ken into his arms. Ken closed his eyes, relishing Ryu's comforting presence before snapping back to reality. Pulling back, he looked at Ryu, slight shock on his face.

"R-Ryu, what are you doing?" Ryu looked down at him and smiled.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm comforting a friend in need." Ryu's smile grew slightly before he pulled Ken back into his embrace.

Ken's eyes began to tear up and he buried his face in Ryu's chest. He just wept quietly for a while, Ryu rubbing his back comfortingly, not saying a word. After a while Ken calmed down and just lay there, not wanting to move. All he focused on was Ryu's body close to him and his hands on his back. He sighed as all his muscles relaxed, the tension in them melting away. A wonderful warmth, soft and soothing washed over him as he closed his eyes and fell a calm, deep sleep, a small smile on his face.

--

Ryu smiled softly down at Ken as he felt him drop off to sleep. _I guess he needed that._ Standing, he lifted Ken and began walking back to the cabin. Carefully opening the door, he carried Ken to the futon and set him down. Resuming his position next to Ken, Ryu smiled again as Ken hugged him in his sleep.

_Looks like I'm his teddy bear. Oh well, I don't mind. I _do_ want his confession when he wakes up though…_ Ryu nodded slightly as he let himself slowly but surely join Ken in his sleep, his arm draped protectively over Ken's body like before.

End Chapter 3

Please R&R. I hope you enjoyed it! Chapter 4 is coming soon!


	4. Chapter 4

The next chapter is here!

As always, here's a reminder:

_Italics _means someone's inner thoughts

-- means a change in POV.

* * *

Chapter 4- Fear

Ryu cursed softly as he searched for Ken. _He's becoming quite good at finding a spot to ambush me during these spars… _He thought with a twinge of annoyance. Wiping his brow, he glanced up at the sky, the light of the afternoon sun hitting his face, and he sighed in frustration. Two whole weeks had passed since they'd arrived at the cabin, and while Ken had recovered his spirit, a lock remained over his lips when it came to the truth about that day. He continued to dodge the questions whenever they came up, much to Ryu's chagrin.

_I don't normally get angry, but all this dodging is really starting to piss me off._ It bothered him so much in fact, he hadn't had a good night's sleep for almost a week now. However, no matter how hard it had been for him, he had kept to his promise not to tell Ken before Ken told him. Still, with each passing day with no progress towards his goal, the resolve to keep that promise was waning, worn away by his continued frustration.

_Behind me!_ Ryu shifted sideways when he sensed Ken's attack, and turned to counter-attack. They continued to fight aggressively for a few minutes before they took a break to rest. Panting softly, Ryu leaned against a tree and looked over at Ken, standing against another tree. Ken seemed fine, the pain of the prior week was gone, but there was still an aura of fear surrounding him. It was so frustrating that Ryu couldn't break through that aura and bring the real Ken to the surface. He growled, his resolve finally giving in to his frustration. _Enough is enough, I can't take it anymore! Ken will confess today, no matter what!_ Standing, he strode over to Ken and placed his large hands on Ken's shoulders, pinning him in place. Ken looked up at him, surprised.

"Ryu… What-" Ken stiffened slightly as Ryu gripped him tighter.

"Ken, you need to tell me. I can't wait any longer for the answer. Why did you do what you did?" The fear flew into Ken's eyes for a moment before he looked away and shook his head once, trembling slightly. "No."

Growling, Ryu simply took a breath and asked it again.

"Why did you destroy the temple? Tell me."

"No." Ken's stubborn reply was a strong counterpoint to his face. It clearly showed to Ryu the inner battle that was going on between Ken's heart and his head, his heart screaming the answer inside while his head cut it off at his lips, driven by some irrational fear to keep him silent.

--

_I can't tell him… I just can't… If I do, I just know I'll let something slip…_ Ken thought as his heart and mind did battle. His head won out in the end, and the vision that had haunted his dreams every night came back, sharper than ever. Ryu cast a disgusted look over his shoulder, a scowl distorting his normally calm and serious face before he turned and disappeared.

Ken's heart skipped a beat as he heard him ask again, "Why did you do that?" Ryu's words beat themselves against his will, and he panicked, feeling the wall of silence cracking, weakening. He began to struggle violently, trying to get away before he gave in to the desire to answer.

"Ryu! Let me go!" Ryu only tightened his grip on him.

"No. I've waited two weeks for your answer, and I'm not letting go until I hear it. Why won't you tell me?" Ryu bowed his head. "Please… Tell me…" he pleaded.

Ken began to tear up, the pain in Ryu's voice fracturing his will. However, the fear replaced his will before his heart could talk, causing him to panic. With all the strength he could muster, he threw Ryu off him and into a nearby tree. Ryu had only a moment to see the sheer panic in Ken's eyes before he hit his head on the trunk, hard. He fell face-first to the forest floor, knocked out from the impact.

_Ryu! _Panic surged through Ken as he hurried over and quickly checked Ryu for serious injuries. Finding none, he bowed his head and sobbed. Tears fell freely from his face as he flipped Ryu over and settled him more comfortably before he stood and turned to go.

"I'm sorry Ryu…" He sobbed, "I can't tell you. But I know if I see you again, I'll be unable to keep it in anymore." The fear of the result of telling Ryu driving him slightly out of his mind, Ken continued. "Rather than drive you away, or ruin your life, or hurt you in any way, I'm leaving. I'll protect you… from everything... including me…" Turning, he ran off towards the cabin. As soon as he arrived, he quickly packed his things and, sliding on his sandals and pack, he ran into the woods, not caring which direction, so long as it was away from Ryu. After about an hour of running non-stop, he collapsed against a tree, clutching his chest as he rolled into a ball.

_I left him behind, unconscious… in the dirt… He'll never forgive me for that. _A jolt of grief shot through him, and he embraced it, sobbing openly for a while. After he had calmed down, he stood and turned spiritless eyes on the distant trees. _Well then, I guess now there's nothing to do but keep going…_ Nodding weakly, he started walking, staring blankly forward as he made his slow journey through the forest.

--

_Ow… my head…_ Ryu groaned loudly as he slowly came to. Blinking, he glanced at the sky. _Dusk…_ Gingerly touching his head, he quickly remembered what had happened before he lost consciousness. The pain instantly leaving him, he swept his eyes over the area, searching for any sign of Ken. Seeing nothing, he sighed.

_Of course he left. He must have panicked and gone back to the cabin… but if that's the case, then why didn't he take me with him?_ Fear gripping his heart, he shook himself back to action and hurried to the cabin.

Opening the door, his heart stopped for a second as he saw the room empty, then sped up dangerously as he saw that Ken's things were missing. _Shit! He's gone!_ Running outside, he desperately tried to see which way Ken had left. The panic grew almost unbearable until he caught a glimpse of something in the underbrush off to his right. Hurrying over, Ryu saw Ken's footprints in the undergrowth and broken twigs nearby. Kneeling, he quickly examined the prints. The ball of the foot was much deeper than the heel, meaning Ken ran full-force into the woods. Ryu's jaw set as he gazed into the woods. _I've got to find him!_

Jumping up, he raced for his sandals. Sliding them on, he turned and ran after Ken, minus his own pack so he could run faster. As he ran, following Ken's path, he felt a drop of rain hit his cheek and a peal of thunder crashed about him.

_Of course. How cliché. _Ryu cursed Murphy and his law to hell and back as he ran, the rain rapidly blanketing the area. He swore, for this deluge was starting to wipe Ken's footprints clean. He ran faster. About 20 minutes later Ryu completely lost the trail. Stopping, Ryu cupped his hands around his mouth and started shouting as loud as he could.

"KEN!! KEN!!" He shouted Ken's name like a chant, but the wind tossed his chant astray as the rain continued to drown the path ahead.

Ryu felt panic take complete control of his body, and he bolted headlong into the forest, screaming "KEN!" as he ran. After another ten minutes of non-stop running, Ryu finally tired and slumped against a tree. He curled up, his tears mixing with the rain that ran down his face. His determination had been crushed. He'd failed. He'd lost Ken forever. Weeping for a moment, he was about to stand and return to the cabin when he spotted something odd in the mud in front of him. He hurried over and began to dig rapidly. Pulling it out, he watched as the rain washed the mud off, revealing it to be one of Ken's sandals. _Ken must have lost it while he was running! He might be nearby!_

Hope leaped into his chest as he looked around for Ken, but it soon faded as he realized that the sandal was near a very steep slope… and there was a large chunk missing from it.

Gripping the sandal tightly as fear gripped his heart, he shouted down the slope. "KEN! KEN! CAN YOU HEAR ME?" All that answered was the storm, its voice drowning out his.

Finding a spot that wasn't very steep, Ryu ran down the incline and looked frantically around for Ken. A flash of lightning illuminated the area briefly, but it was just enough to expose a shock of blond hair and a glimpse of red gi in the distance before it faded. Ryu sprinted over to Ken, relief in his features. The relief soon left him as he got closer and saw the scene before him.

Ken was unconscious, his head tipped to the side and his body half-buried in the mud of the slope. His pack lay a few feet further down the slope, obviously lost in the fall.

_Ken… _Ryu nearly lost it when he saw his friend like that, but quickly composed himself and hurriedly shouldered Ken's pack, then turned his full attention to Ken. Swiftly checking what he saw of Ken for any serious injuries, he saw none and Ken's neck seemed to be perfectly fine. Other than a couple bruises, he seemed to be unharmed. Breathing a sigh of true relief, Ryu began to dig Ken out. Ken almost slid down the incline when he was released from the mud's grip, but Ryu deftly caught him and carried him down.

Finding a relatively dry spot, Ryu lightly shook Ken, trying to get him to wake up. "Ken… Ken…" He repeated, softly brushing his face. As soon as his hand touched Ken's face however, he blanched.

_Shit! He's burning up! Screw this, we're going home._ Ryu gathered Ken in his arms. Standing, Ryu rapidly got their bearings and headed home, shielding Ken from the rain as best he could.

An hour later, he had reached their cabin. Grabbing a towel, Ryu stripped Ken of his clothes and swiftly dried him off. Setting him down on their futon, he covered Ken with every blanket he could find in the room. Heading outside briefly, he wet a small cloth with the rain and placed it on Ken's forehead. Ken was shivering, even under all those blankets, but he didn't seem to be in any danger.

Now that Ken was okay, Ryu took this opportunity to change his own clothes. Returning to Ken's side, he stayed up all night, continually doctoring Ken before his fever finally broke just before dawn. Ryu smiled softly, finally settling in for sleep. He slid under the covers, holding Ken as tightly as he could. Nuzzling Ken's neck, he sighed happily as Ken hugged him back.

_You're back Ken, and now that you are, I don't think I'm going to let go any time soon…_ Relief and happiness swept all over his body, from his head to his toes as he succumbed to sleep, gripping his Ken tighter as he nodded off.

End Chapter 4

I hope you enjoyed it! I tried super hard on this chapter! Please R&R, it's much appreciated!


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